Possibility

Rebirth

I.
Agony, shivering--
how much more can I endure?
Trudging onwards through the wasteland:
the teenage wasteland.
Alone. Always alone. Fighting,
fighting everyone,
but most of all myself.
Which makes it all the harder.
Rationalizing, slipping away
further into the delusions.
It is all I can do not to scream,
the gasps
coming short and quick
torn from me
like you were.
Fate is nothing
God, I wish fate were nothing.

II.
Then emerging, breathing,
feeling the light on my cheeks,
the wind on my lips.
Suffering leads to contentment,
though what I am content with
is empty.
Not alone anymore,
sang vivant in my veins,
pulsing like wine.
The dead leaves
are beautiful,
everything is symbolic of my struggle.
Tomorrow might be the wind
that blows out my flame
but it may be the fire
that ignites my heart.

***

Monotony

We go through the motions because we have to.
I tell you welcome,
you ask me my name.
I answer:
Laure.
You fidget with your tie.
You're friends with A.?
Yes, you are.
Have a drink, you ask me.
I say no, but watch you indulge.
The punch stains your lips.
Evening.
And it begins again.

***
Je ne suis la petite bellete de personne.